Kit Knightly

 

It’s always funny to see Covid in the news, and funnier still to see supposedly normal humans reacting to it as if it means something.

An historical curiosity. Like seeing someone riding a penny-farthing.

But a shocking number of these people do exist, a trip to Covid-twitter will teach you that. There are, apparently, a surprising number of penny farthings still on the road.

Maybe those Japanese soldiers who never realized World War II was over is a better comparison.

Anyway, we have a new variant and a “unique” symptom to discuss. The variant is called XFG, nicknamed “stratus”, and the super unique special symptom?

A hoarse voice.

Yes, that’s it.

I shouldn’t have to tell you that a “hoarse voice” is not a unique symptom. Literally any respiratory infection can make your voice hoarse, as can allergies.

But what’s funnier is that they’re not even definitively claiming it is unique, to quote The Indy:

Some experts have claimed that Stratus can give patients a “hoarse voice”.

I’m going to repeat that, with some added emphasis:

Some experts have claimed that Stratus can give patients a “hoarse voice”.

So, the totally generic symptom may or may not be a sign of “stratus” COVID according to some of the experts. Possibly. That’s it, that’s the whole the news.

This comes fresh off “nimbus” (they decided to switch to clouds from Greek letters, I think to avoid the “pi variant”, but we’ll never know), which had the unique “sore throat” symptom. They tried to call it “razor throat” to be dramatic, but it’s just a sore throat.

Got that?

Nimbus = “razor throat”

Stratus = “hoarse voice”. Maybe.

Lord help you if you get both. I mean, what causes a sore throat AND a hoarse voice? In the autumn. As the weather gets colder. And kids are going back to school.

I’m drawing a blank.

And people – people that are allowed to drive and vote and dress themselves – will be running out to get their autumn boosters over this.

The Plato’s Cave of it all is genuinely fascinating.

 

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Categories: coronavirus, latest